Pro golfer Tom Lehman shares life lessons at 2019 Hoover Mayor's Prayer Breakfast
Words matter, perspective is big and forgiveness is essential for good relationships.
Those were three life lessons pro golfer Tom Lehman shared with 600 or so people at the 37th annual Hoover Mayor’s Prayer Breakfast this morning.
Lehman, who is in town for the 2019 Regions Tradition golf tournament, told the crowd at the Hyatt Regency Birmingham — The Wynfrey Hotel that God has used golf to teach him those and other lessons throughout his career.
He recounted a time when he had a good start to take the lead in the British Open but messed up his game with some bad shots on the 13th and 14th holes. He was furious, and his caddy took a moment to calm him down by reminding him he believed he was the best player in the field and that he just needed to relax and play the game.
“What makes a great caddy is people who can say the right thing at the right time,” Lehman said. “He got me focused on the task at hand, but he gave me confidence because he believed in me.”
The lesson he learned that day is that words really matter, he said.
“What we say really has an impact,” Lehman said. “The words that we choose to use either can build up or tear down. They can unite, or they can divide.”
Lehman recalled another time early in his career when he was on the U.S Open tour in 1990 and he was broke and in debt, traveling around in a beat-up car with his wife and 3-month-old daughter.
He didn’t have his own caddy, so he had to ask for one. The course pro in Wichita, Kansas, found a recent high school graduate to caddy for him, but the young man didn’t play golf and therefore was little help to him, other than carrying his clubs and keeping him company.
Lehman ended up winning the tournament, which was big for him, and collected a $20,000 prize. It’s customary for the winning player to give 10% of the prize to his caddy, and Lehman said he debated whether he should give $2,000 to this young man who did little for him when he really needed the money himself. “It was all about me,” he said.
He decided to give the caddy the $2,000 and didn’t learn until months later that the young man had a difficult home life and needed the $2,000 to pay tuition to go to a Bible college.
Lehman said it’s easy in professional golf, as you get red-carpet treatment, to begin to think that it’s all about you. But that tournament taught him early that perspective is important and that while our perspective is limited, God has the bigger picture in mind and that it’s important to do the right thing, even when it’s hard.
Lehman also shared how a Scottish journalist once unjustifiably strongly criticized him in Golf World magazine as being a hypocritical Christian. The next time he saw the writer, he berated him with every curse word in the book and felt justified in doing so, he said.
Seven years later, when Lehman was chosen as captain of the Ryder Cup team, the same writer wrote about being cussed out and berated by Lehman, and Lehman said he felt terrible about what he had said to the writer.
He emailed the journalist, apologized and asked for forgiveness. The journalist responded within five minutes and quickly forgave him, which taught him a lot, he said.
“Forgiveness is probably the biggest thing we can do,” Lehman said. “Forgiveness is totally wrapped up in humility. A prideful person can’t do it. … Granting forgiveness is maybe the most godly thing we can do.”
Unforgiveness destroys relationships, he said. It’s important to understand the forgiveness that God extends to us, to forgive ourselves for the sin in our lives and mistakes we make, and to be willing to forgive others, he said. “It’s been a life changer for me.”
Hoover Mayor Frank Brocato encouraged attendees at the prayer breakfast not to just focus on prayer for one day.
“Let’s come together united as a community to lift one another up in our daily struggles and challenges,” the mayor said. “Every one of us is going through something on any given day. Why not take time to pray for the people that you come in contact with, regardless of if you know them or not?”
Brocato asked the crowd to pray for him and other city and community leaders, including teachers, public safety workers, church leaders, health care workers, business owners, neighbors and friends.
“There’s power in prayer,” Brocato said. “Let us use it to prosper our city just to make us to continue to be a wonderful city.”
The prayer breakfast was sponsored and organized by the Hoover Beautification Board. ABC 33/40 news anchor Brenda Ladun served as mistress of ceremonies, and Father Joy Nellissery of Prince of Peace Catholic Church led the crowd in prayer several times.