Everyone has their own reasons for doing home renovations. In our case, my wife and I were expecting and about to be squeezed out by two new humans.
At the age of 50, most of my peers have finished raising kids and are looking toward life as free-range adults. All that changed for me when I got married again — to a more mature woman who happened to be 16 years younger than I. Fast forward a few years, and I’d like to introduce you to Jack and Piper, the twins.
We knew our two-ish bedroom Crestwood home was not ready for the invasion, so we embarked on a journey of modifications to make room for raising children.
Until the stork’s announcement, we had not realized how spread-out we had been living, until my wife, her petite baby bump and I started taking my clothes out of the would-be nursery without an idea as to where to put them. As it was described to me later, I just stood frozen in place with an armload of clothes and a clueless look on my face. It was kindly meant.
We needed closet space quickly, and after much deliberation we came up with the brilliant idea of enlarging our master bedroom 30-inches to create a closet where a wall once stood. This meant shaving off some space in the adjoining living room, and moving a hallway door 3 feet to the right. Easy-peasy.
We masked up for guests and met with our California Closets person who had honest eyes and the fanciest face covering I had ever seen. This was a good omen. More importantly, she had one of those measuring tapes that was really a laser. That sealed the deal for me because anyone who brings lasers to a business meeting is my friend and must be trusted. At that point, I ceded all decisions to her.
Did you know suede was a real color?
Our new friend created a 3D computer model — with lasers I’m sure — and we made our plan together. She was in charge of design, build and installation. Our job was to move a wall and frame up a shell for the closets. Demolition started immediately, and our contractor removed the wall in one day. This suggested everything was going to happen quickly, so we sat on our bed and stared at the other side of the house, including that really bright street lamp in the window I had never noticed before.
A week later, I owned a really nice sleep mask, and our little circle of trust was working at full speed. Then COVID-19 hit the brakes on manufacturing, delaying production until two months before the due date. I looked at my wife who was throwing up a ginger chew, and we agreed that we had plenty of time. Fast forward two months and they were totally right. My clothes were now hanging in a closet that they never really deserved, and my wife was now staring at clothes that no longer fit. The closets were perfect.
But how can such a modern suede closet sit so close to a 1950s dirt brown bathroom that was designed for maybe 1.5 people? This was an imbalance that needed to be rectified. I mean, we had two months … so custom bathroom here we come.
This required planning at lightning speed. I helped my wife into the car, and we raced to Ferguson Showrooms near downtown. Let me just say, OMG! There was a bathtub in there that would inspire Ron Swanson to find his feminine side. We steeled ourselves the best way we could and gave all our money to the sales person, even though she did not have any lasers. Bath fixtures — done!
Thirteen stops at Floor and Decor later, we had selected everything we needed, moved the wall 16 inches north and restored the ceiling that decided it needed that wall more than it had previously suggested. The Carrara marble arrived three weeks later, and our tile guy was well on his way to put the shine on our new bathroom.
I looked at my wife confidently, and we began packing for the hospital. Just one more word of encouragement to Mr. Tile-Guy. “... Mr. Tile-Guy?” But he couldn’t hear us because he was in jail.
We left our contractor with some very encouraging words and left the rest in his capable unshackled hands. My wife had noted the same look on his face described earlier when I was holding clothes and not knowing where to put them. She was very subtle and encouraging that way.
Let me just say that when our contractor said he would complete the job before the babies arrived, we had no idea how literal a person he was. Our mistake. What I am sure he meant to say was, “You will see the taillights of my trailer pulling out of your driveway as you are arriving from the hospital with your beautiful new babies.” If we knew this, we would have been totally chill, I’m sure.
All ended well. The babies are living with us for now, and our master bedroom has a sleek wall of closets and a pretty cool en suite that will one day be the envy of any future buyer.
Whatever your motivation, modernizing a bathroom and providing more storage is one great way to increase the value of your home. Moving walls can also open up new possibilities, though it is important to work with a contractor who will make sure your roof does not become a floor. Even non-load bearing walls can surprise you.
We have now paused future plans for renovations until Piper determines that her brother is stinky and she will need a room of her own. Meanwhile, this begs the question for all my future appointments. Should I bring lasers?
Written by Marshall Malone, a third-generation Realtor currently at RealtySouth.
